Exclusive Interview with Paula!

This is Spamness again, I'm sorry for the long delay between interviews, but I'm happy to bring you the latest scoop! I know you've all been looking forward to it! So read on!

Spamness: PSI Greetings Alpha, Paula!
Paula: Uh... yeah. Ha... ha... Haven't heard *that* one before.

SN: *ahem* Anyways, thanks for agreeing to an interview. You were #2 in the group that saved all of humanity from Giygas, right? That was pretty amazing...
P: Number 2? More like the only one, or at least I might as well have been...

SN: Wow, I'm sensing a little tension. Getting on to my questions: You've been out of the public eye for over 11 years now. What've you been up to?
P: I've been starting up my own line of restaurants. I already have every frying pan manufacturer in the world breaking down my door trying to sponsor me. On top of that, I don't need a grill, I've been honing PSI Grill alpha! See?
*A hamburger is instantaneously grilled in front of my eyes*

SN: Wow.... that is impressive! Do you still help out around PoleStar Pre-school? I can imagine they were overjoyed to have you rescued... then to find out you helped save the World!
P: More like PoleStar Prison... I had been trying to escape that place for as long as I can remember. Who would've thought I'd finally have gotten away by asking to join the Happy Happyists...? If I woul---

SN: Wait, wait, wait... Say that again? You tried joining that cult? Did you turn them down and that's why they imprisoned you?
P: The media completely twisted that around... The whole "imprisoned girl in a log cabin" story was completely untrue. It was just a hazing ritual for joining the Happy Happyists. I turned down their offer to have a key to the door... They're really good people!

SN: I didn't expect this. A hazing, huh?
P: Yeah, they put you by yourself for a couple days, while you think blue thoughts, and erase the outside frustrations away... it was really quite relaxing. Before that klutz, Ness, arrived!

SN: The way we heard it, Ness came to your rescue, you were sad for being trapped, h-- well, I'm sure you've heard it as many times as we have. What happened when Ness arrived?
P: So I was sitting there, getting more into the thought of actually joining their group... like I said, it was so relaxing. Ness barges in and starts shouting "I found you!" and "You're saved!" I tried explaining to him what was going on, but he was caught in his own little world... Finally I directed him to Mr. Carpainter, since I obviously had no chance of getting him to listen to me...

SN: But you did give Ness a Franklin Badge to help defeat Carpainter, right...?
P: Hardly! When Ness came rushing in, he grabs at me through the bars, shouting "I'll save you!" and ripped it from my blouse! He better be glad he didn't rip it! Then he goes on to say he'd keep it for good luck... that was MY Franklin Badge. Thief!

SN: So you wanted to join the Happyists, Ness comes in, steals your Franklin badge, uses it as a protection against Carpainter, comes back, opens your cag--
P: Don't forget "Beats up all my new friends"...
SN: --opens the cage, beats up all your new friends, and then you join with him anyway?
P: I was so embarrassed that I ran out of there as quickly as I could. Besides, with Carpainter beat up the whole community fell to pieces... and I still had to get my badge back.

SN: Wow... that is insane! Who would've guessed. Getting back to my questions, one thing that's always hit me as strange, what made you think to start *praying* during your final battle with Giygas? I mean, here you are, face to face with THE most powerful creature on Earth and you decide to drop to your knees and start praying? Was it out of desperation?
P: That's actually a little embarrassing. Could we move on to another question?
SN: Wait, nuh uh... this sounds interesting! C'mon, people want to hear!
P: I didn't get on my knees to start praying. I knelt down because in the midst of battle I lost my contact lens! First one gets knocked out of my eye while we're in the desert... that took forever to find, Ness kept saying "We'll get new ones..." and "You alllways have to hold us up" - If he would've helped look, it wouldn't have taken so long! At least Jeff understood what it was like. Then I lose another while fighting Giygas.

SN: So... you dropped to the floor to find... your contact lens?
P: Yeah...

SN: But, what about the stories that the rest of the group started to pray.
P: Maybe they did, but I doubt it... Have you ever seen Ness praying?
SN: No... not really. But then, what sparked everyone in the whole Earth to start praying for you guys?
P: That's just media hype! I've never met one person who prayed for us...

SN: But--
P: Did you pray for us on that day?
SN: ...No
P: Exactly.

SN: Then what happened to Giygas?
P: None of us really know. I stand up from getting my lens, and the next I know he's in his death throes... Go figure.

SN: Wow... I don't even know where to go from there. You've caught me speechless. Any hopes in hooking back up with Ness? Maybe heading back to that little house you guys bought on the edge of Twoson?
P: I'd love to catch up that little jerk that stuck me with the back taxes for that beeeautiful, GARBAGE DUMP!

SN: Whoa... are your hands on fire?? I think that's my cue to end this interview! It's been a pleasure, thanks agaaaain!

Wow... definitely some interesting information. And you heard it HERE FIRST! On the Spamness News

Spotlight Interview:
Ness's Dad - We know you're interested, because we were! Click this link to read our spotlight interview on Ness's dad. Is he really a phone? Was he supportive of Ness? Does he ever come home to see his family? That's what we'd like to know.